Weakness

by Angie Thomas

So, I have been thinking a lot about our lesson this past week, “Lord, I am Weak!”.  Can I let you in on a little secret? I hate weakness.  I know hate is a strong word, but it is an accurate description of my feelings toward weakness.  To me weakness means frailty, vulnerability, inability, insufficiency, humiliation….all things which cause my flesh to scream and run in the very opposite direction.

The world and our culture despise weakness as well. After all Darwin’s theory is “Survival of the Fittest.” We have been so indoctrinated by this thinking that we do not even realize it.  Jesus’ words sting in our ears and sound like crazy talk: “For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will save it” (Luke 9:24). Lose our lives? We are trying are darndest to make something of our lives! The thought of intentionally laying it down and saying, “I am yours, Lord, do what you will” seems illogical and unwise. It is interesting to note that this statement from Jesus is repeated in some form in all four of the Gospels.  Matthew and Luke repeat it twice.

Apparently this wasn’t just some one time, random thought Jesus shared with His disciples. It was paramount.  It was the way He wanted them to think. He was giving them a new paradigm to live by.  It was the way He lived His life.  Philippians 2:5-7a says, “Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself.” Umm, being emptied of all my dreams and desires seems to me like it would result in weakness and a big fat failure. The NIV actually says “he made himself nothing” in verse 7.

I will be completely honest. The thought of being emptied and made nothing actually brings me to tears. Perhaps it is because it is precisely the journey the Lord has had me on the last several years.  From early on in junior high when I saw myself as a no-name rural farm girl from a very humble family, I decided to pursue things the world’s way.  I decided to do whatever I could to make a name for myself.  I spent 8 years during high school and college pursuing my dreams and an identity.  Valedictorian–check. Student Body President–check. Bachelor’s Degree–check. Master’s Degree–check. Successful career–check.  No surprise, I was left with fulfilled “dreams” but an empty heart.  I had pursued my life and tried to take Jesus along for the ride, and it just didn’t work.

Then Jesus asked me to walk away from it all.  He asked me to leave a career I loved in many ways to serve my family and His body.  He asked me to turn down what appeared to be a “dream” job in missions to serve with a fledgling new ministry that’s course was uncharted and at times uncertain.  He asked my husband and me to trust Him with our family planning in the midst of an adoption that had taken three years.  Then He asked us to surrender the dear sweet little girl we thought we were going to be able to adopt, in place of another child He had created.

He has allowed precisely what was needed for this Type A, prideful, stubborn heart to become “weak”. I prayed many years ago that I would follow the Lord at any cost.  I had no idea how high the cost would be. My life as I saw it and “dreamed” it would be is hanging in shambles. But I am beginning to see the glimpses of the beautiful life He promised for those who would lose their life.  As I sat in the room at Bible study last Tuesday night and saw all of you–your heart’s so open and hungry for Him–my heart was filled with overwhelming joy and gladness!  As I see the beloved faces of my children hungering after God and His Word, I see His life.  It is breathtaking and far more beautiful than the dreams I could have ever concocted.

So, my word of encouragement to you, my fellow sisters in Christ is, LET GO.  Don’t be afraid of whatever He is doing to “mess” with your life.  Whether the trial be big or small you can trust Him.  His Father heart of love towards you is strong and sure.  Ask Him for the grace to surrender to whatever is His highest and best for you and your life.  Isaiah 41:9-10 says, “you whom I took from the ends of the earth, and calledfrom its farthest corners, saying to you, ‘You are my servant, I have chosen you and not cast you off’;fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”

In handing Him your dreams and your life you are sure to find richness and joy beyond your wildest dreams.  The way down really is the way up.

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Her that Halteth

by Susan Sampson

I am “her that halteth.”  I want to run with diligence but am so easily distracted, deterred, so weak, and full of fear. I praise God for his promise to “save her that halteth” (Zeph. 3:19, KJV).  I praise God for the gospel.  I praise God that His ways are not my ways, that His ways are so far higher than my ways.  I would never willingly lay down my life for an enemy.  Jesus did.  We were all His enemies at one time.  “Once you were alienated from God and were enemies in your minds because of your evil behavior. But now he has reconciled you by Christ’s physical body through death to present you holy in his sight, without blemish and free from accusation” (Col. 1:21-22, NIV).   There is no greater love.

I praise God for Paul and for Elijah and for Timothy.  I thank Him for showing us so clearly who they all were apart from the Spirit of God.  This gives me great hope.  This helps me see that Jesus is my only hope.  This gives me gratitude and humility for the gift of the Holy Spirit for apart from Christ I can do nothing.  I praise God that when Psalm 73:21-22 is so true of me (“When my soul was embittered, when I was pricked in heart, I was brutish and ignorant, I was like a beast toward you“) that Psalm 73:23-26 comes right after in deliverance — “Nevertheless, I am continually with you; you hold my right hand.  You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will receive me to glory.  Whom have I in heaven but you?  And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides you.  My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.”

There is no greater gift than the gift of faith, the gift of our salvation.  There is no one good, no not one.  We all deserved to be eternally condemned to destruction.  “But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ — by grace you have been saved…” (Ehp. 2:4-5).  This is the reason we must fan into flame the gift of God which is in us.  We must put our faith in Christ alone.  There is no soundness in our flesh.  I was in that meeting with Laurie confessing my need to control my life.  It is a lie that we control anything.  God alone is the Sovereign Lord.  “For by him all things were created, in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities– all thing were created through him and for him.  And he is before all things, and in him all things hold together” (Col. 1:16-17). 

Holy Father, grant us repentance from our fear and cowardice, from our ridiculous thinking that if we try harder it will get better, from our pride and unbelief.  Grant us the faith to believe that we too can be like Paul, that the Spirit of God dwells in us, that we have been given a very great and precious promise — the promise of everlasting life.  Grant us true humility to come up under your word, believing by faith it is true so we can fan into flame the great gift you have given us.  In Jesus’ name, Amen!

 

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Enduring

by Susan Sampson

As I was reading the weekly scripture verse from Hebrews 12:1-3 the Lord caught my attention.  The author of Hebrews writes, “Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith…”  The phrase “let us run with endurance” reminded me of our reading in Romans.  Paul writes, “Through him we have also obtained access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and we rejoice in hope of the glory of God.  More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope...” (Rom. 5:2-4).

As I’ve shared, I’m not a runner, but I am accustomed to running in one way — running from suffering.  Sadly in doing so I run away from the Lord and His purposes for me.  I run away from the gospel. I run from the very thing the Lord wants to use in my life to produce endurance, character, and hope.  In the gospel we are called to suffer, to put our flesh to death, to die to self as Christ died for us on the cross.  The Lord is sovereign, He is in control of all things at all times.  I must confess my unbelief and choose by faith to believe God’s Word that He uses all things together for good.  He allows suffering to come into our lives to bring us to the end of ourselves and to bring us to Him.  Remember Paul’s words in 2 Corinthians 1:9: “Indeed we felt that we had received the sentence of death.  But that was to make us rely not on ourselves, but on God who raises the dead.”  Our suffering pushes us, tests our faith, strengthens our faith, proves our faith.  Our suffering pushes us to remember the gospel.  It brings us on eagles wings to Jesus.

When our lives are manageable and orderly we don’t think we need God.  When we are in control (or think we are in control — because the truth is that we’re not at all) we don’t think we need God.  Dare I believe suffering is a gift?!  This is true.  Look at what Paul writes in Philippians 1:29-30: “For it has been granted to you that for the sake of Christ you should not only believe in him but also suffer for his sake, engaged in the same conflict that you saw I had and now hear that I still have.”  Lord, I want to believe, help my unbelief!  Deliver me from my wrong thinking, my human thinking.  Your ways are not our ways — they are far higher.  So high I cannot see.  Give us eyes to see and hearts that understand.  Humble us, Lord, that we would stop relying on our own understanding, perceptions, feelings, or logic!

I was wondering what the opposite of endurance was — quitting? stopping? giving in?  Remember Laurie said when she was running she heard, “Stop.”  She testified that it was the grace of God that allowed her to endure.  We are not called to quit, we are called to follow.  Praise God we are not left to ourselves to accomplish this.  Praise God for the amazing gift of the Holy Spirit — “for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure” (Phil. 2:13).  Lord, we need you.  We are weak and unable apart from you.  Please give us much grace.  Help us to remember the gospel and preach the gospel to ourselves in those moments that come everyday when we are tempted to unbelief, pride, anger, fear, being ashamed, and giving in.  Help us to fan the flame, guard the treasure, and follow the pattern of the sound Word — the Living Word, Jesus Christ by the faith and love that are in Jesus, who dwells in each believer.

Help us, Father, take your truth to our hearts continually throughout every day.  Bring your truth to life in our hearts.  Enable us by your love and grace to live the gospel.  “For from him and through him and to him are all things.  To him be glory forever.  Amen” (Rom. 11:36).

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