Grace for the Details

This was my thought today… “everything is sweeter with Jesus.” I know this sounds perhaps cheesy or cliché, but it really hit me as a distinct reality tonight.  I love Charles Spurgeon’s quote from our homework this past week: “If you are a child of God, you will see your Father’s face and live in your Father’s love.” What does that look like practically in our daily lives?

As we have been filling out our trees and asking the Lord to search our hearts, I continue to be humbled and saddened by the fruit of unrighteousness I see. The roots of pride and idolatry of self are so deep and are still producing angry outbursts with my children, selfish choices with friends, and coveting, just to name a few.

But the truly wonderful and beautiful thing this time around as I go through Heart of a Woman for the third or forth time (I mean, who’s counting?) is that I am starting to see Jesus more and more as my Advocate and Friend and less like the angry parent, watching me with hands on hips.

And the amazing thing is that this translates into an ever deepening and intimate prayer life with my Savior.  As I preform less and try to cry out more often for His grace and wisdom, the pressure is lessened, my heart is stilled, and I am finding joy in tasks that normally cause me anxiety and turmoil. It is really interesting.

Take tonight as an example. For some reason I get a knot in my stomach every afternoon around 4pm. It probably sounds ridiculous, but the thought of dinner and hungry people looming on the horizon makes me want to run and hide…seriously. I don’t particularly enjoy cooking and struggle with decisiveness when it comes to meal planning, so often just the decision of WHAT to cook can leave me in angst. Throw in my precious children bickering and fighting, a to-do list that is long and unaccomplished, and my old girl is ready to rear her ugly head.

It is puzzling to me how often the daily, nominal circumstances of life can railroad my faith and trust in Jesus. The Lord has been so kind in helping me see my wrong-thinking. I approach these situations with the idea that I should be stronger, wiser, more prepared. Good grief, it seems pitiful to have to cry out to Jesus for help preparing a meal when I have been a wife for eleven years and mother for nine! You would think I would have this dinner thing nailed by now!

Pride is so deceptive, isn’t it?  Our flesh so desperately wants to be able to preform anything…something…the smallest task without having to ask for help. So we fret and worry…and SIN…all because we don’t have the humility to confess our need.

So tonight, as I felt those feelings of worry, fear, and inadequacy creeping into my heart, I confessed them to Jesus. He gently and lovingly reminded me that He was with me. I wasn’t “performing” for Him; I was joining Him in what He already wanted to do for my family. He helped me find the recipe that used exactly the ingredients I had on hand, but the biggest blessing was just that I didn’t feel stressed out. I had grace to extend to my children and a warm hello to shower on my husband when he got home from work. It was amazing.

Sweet friends, let’s ask for His grace and cry out to Him for the little and big things in our days. May we put to death the pride that whispers, “You should have this figured out,” and instead run to our Precious Savior and Advocate and humbly confess that we need Him in EVERYTHING…even preparing a simple meal. May we find grace to stop performing and peace in our growing dependence upon Jesus. “The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about ANYTHING, but in EVERYTHING by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” (Phil. 4:5b-7, emphasis added).

Rooted in Christ